Sunday, May 24, 2009

Wish List

The month of June never fails to bring one good reason to celebrate. Its third Sunday marks the day of great importance to my three daughters. Together, they observe its yearly significance in the same manner that I remember their grandfather on Father’s Day.

June is also the month that touches a nerve that is deeply rooted in me. It painfully reminds me of the death anniversary of someone very dear to me. He was a soldier who fought and lived the horror of the Korean War in the fifties. More than four decades later this one heck of a man fought his final battle, against a much stronger foe. On June 9, 1995, lung cancer defeated him. I lost my father, my great mentor, my hero and my best friend.

During the grieving years that followed, I eased the pain by immersing myself deeper into photography, the art I learned from him. It is our common ground and our strongest bond. It is the only dimension where our spirits connect. Holding a camera is like touching his hand. I feel his presence in every photo that I shoot. His passing away also inspired me to write a short fictional story about a son’s heart-warming relationship with his father. It is a story that mirrors my grief-stricken self, still longing for him every Father’s Day.

The story begins:
John is up in the attic of his father’s house, cleaning up. The morning sunlight beaming through the window makes the floating dust even more visible. Boxes of garbage to be thrown out are finally separated from the items that he thinks are worth keeping. The house where John grew up is now listed for sale. His father passed away just a month ago.

An old shoebox with string tied around it catches John’s eyes. He wonders what is so important inside the box. It seems like a well guarded treasure. He opens it. An old sepia photo greets him. Faded and torn around the edges but otherwise still recognizable. It’s a picture of a smiling little boy, mounted on his father’s shoulder. They both look happy. John remembers the day when the photo was taken. It was on a bright summer day. His father took him out to see the Air Show. He remembers everything about it. The thundering roar of the fighter planes flying overhead, the ice cream cone melting in his hand and dripping on his Dad’s shoulder are still crystal-clear in his memory. Underneath were more photos of family events and important documents. John wants to see more photos of his father. He continues to dig in. Reaching the bottom, he finds a folded lined paper. It looks very familiar. He examines it closely and quickly realizes that it was the Wish List that he wrote when he was in his fourth grade, over thirty years ago. His teacher gave him an “A” for it. With a smile on his face he reads….

1. I wish my father was as brave as Batman so he could stand on guard and scare the ghosts away while I sleep.
2. I wish my father was as strong as Hercules so he could protect me from the school bully.
3. I wish my father was a millionaire so he could buy me the most expensive bicycle.
4. I wish my father was a famous musician so that the whole world could hear his music on the radio.
5. I wish my father was as smart as Einstein so he could do my all my homework and I could get the highest mark in school.
6. I wish my father was the president of our country so he could be the most powerful man across the land.
7. I wish my father was the best in all sports so that all the boys in school would envy me.
8. I wish my father was a handsome movie actor and admired by many people.

Just below the last wish is a hand written note. He can almost hear the usual soft-spoken words of his father as he reads, “Son, I am sorry to disappoint you. I could never be what you wished for.”

After all those years, John did not know that his father replied to his selfish wishes. He looks at the picture of his father and with his voice almost like a whisper, he says: “Dad, you were not as brave as Batman, but you showed me the courage to keep going in the most difficult times; you were not as strong as Hercules, but you gave me the strength to grow and face the harsh reality of the world; you were not a millionaire, but you provided for me with the best you could possibly afford; you were not a musician, but the stories you told me were like music to my ears; you were not as smart as Einstein, but you sent me to school so I could obtain the education you never had; you were not the president of our country, but you held our family together with your values and principles; you were never an athlete, but you always played with me when no one would; you were not a movie star, but you were always real. You never pretended to be what you were not.”

With his teary eyes, he continues, “Dad, if you only knew….you are far above my wishes. You surpassed what I expected of you. And on that list, I would like to add one more, my last and final wish. On the day that I face my own death, may your spirit be there by my side, to comfort the scared little boy in me. ………thank you for making me what I am today.”

And that ends the story.
To all fathers out there, I extend my warmest greeting,
HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!